Saturday, June 28, 2008

A Bedtime I'll Never Forget


A few nights ago I was putting Spencer & Carter down for the night. I had crawled into bed with them on the lower bunk and we were snuggled in tight. I sang a few songs and thought that it was time for Spencer to go up to the top. I asked Spencer if he would climb up,....but he started crying. Not any old tears, but the kind that looked so sad and heartbroken. I had no idea what had upset him. I asked him if he wanted to stay with Carter, or if he wanted me to stay longer. After many questions with no reply, I finally got it out of him. This is what he said, "I don't want you to die." ---Now I have to be honest here. Spencer is such a good kid, does what we ask him, loves to please others, is very good natured, ...truly one of the best kids out there-- that I began to wonder if Spencer knew something that I didn't. This freaked me out a little to say the least, but of course my tender boy's feelings were hanging in the balance and he needed some understanding, so then I told him I wasn't going anywhere! Mom was here to stay for a long, long time! That I wasn't sick, I take good care of myself, and I have a looooooot of good years left!!!!!!!!! (Right, little buddy?) And then I tried to explain that heaven forbid something happened to any one of us, (again, I hope not me) that it will be okay because families are forever. If we do the best we can with what we know, we will live with each other up in heaven forever. I have never been hit so strongly with my testimony of this and the Spirit about something so, so important before. I don't do this enough, but I bore my testimony to my little Spencer about the plan of happiness and about how much we are loved by our Heavenly Father & Jesus and about how they have made it possible so we can be together. I was instantly so grateful for my little Spencer and all that I have and know. And boy did I rededicate myself to be better! It sure made an impression on my night about how much I love my kids and about how important it is for me to live in a way that mirrors my beliefs in the gospel. I started saying that we will never miss FHE again! Rob and I need to go to the temple asap, and the list went on and on. I'm so grateful I have a child that inspires and reminds me to be good. Spencer spurred on some real thought provoking perspective on the future for me and how I want our family to be.

Thanks Spence for caring so much and for being such an amazing kid! You are so, so special! You are so likable and genuine. Never change little buddy. Luv you tons!

6 comments:

Piano Mom said...

Dang...I need Kleenex!

RP said...

That is such a sweet story! Spencer is so cute! We miss having him around to make us smile!

Leslie said...

what a sweet little boy! i loved seeing and eating your cute kids up! spencer is too special and that carter has a cute personality! way too much fun, next time lets not wait almost 3 years :)

TC Jolley said...

Nothing like one of our own children to make us want to be better. Good job Spencer, you are such a good boy!

Rachel said...

That Spencer is definitely a thinker...and sensitive too! You are raising a good boy...keep it up!

Jacy said...

Wow, that was sweet. Good thing we have our kids so we can look through the eyes of a child sometimes. It's nice to be reminded to reevaluate. : )